Emily Ladau:
Hi, I’m Emily Ladau.

Kyle Khachadurian:
And I’m Kyle Khachadurian.

Emily Ladau:
And you’re listening to another episode of The Accessible Stall.

Kyle Khachadurian:
What are we going to talk about today, Emily?

Emily Ladau:
Well, in case you couldn’t tell by our lack of enthusiasm, we’re going to be talking about how we are not feeling Disability Pride Month at all.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah, it’s rough out here this July.

Emily Ladau:
And before you shut this off because you think that we’re a total bummer, I feel like let’s talk through why, because there are some very valid reasons as to why we’re not feeling it. And also I don’t think anybody else is really feeling it either.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah, I haven’t seen as much excitement as I normally do.

Emily Ladau:
Which kind of is a disappointment. It’s so funny. On the one hand, you know how people get mad when corporations do all of this stuff for Pride Month?

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yes.

Emily Ladau:
Whether it’s like LGBTQ Pride Month or Disability Pride Month or honoring some kind of heritage month, it’s like, “Capitalism is not the place for this and don’t sell out by supporting it.”

Kyle Khachadurian:
But you miss it when it’s not, or at least you notice when it’s not there.

Emily Ladau:
Oh my God. I went into a Starbucks yesterday and I saw a Disability Pride Month sign in the Starbucks.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Oh, that’s pretty cool actually.

Emily Ladau:
And got so excited.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Nice.

Emily Ladau:
And I don’t feel excited about the month, but I think there was just something that was almost like cool about being reminded that someone cares.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah, like, “You guys know about this? Nice.” Sort of thing.

Emily Ladau:
It had a flag in the background and everything.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Oh, that is pretty cool.

Emily Ladau:
Also, I don’t know if you noticed this, but lots of people love to take our episode where we did the interview with Ann Magill-

Kyle Khachadurian:
I have noticed.

Emily Ladau:
Scrape it for content and repurpose it and be like, “Well, I know what the flag means.” It’s like, “Yeah [inaudible 00:02:24].”

Kyle Khachadurian:
We’ve made it, Emily. That was a good get. She’s a hard get. Shout out to Ann Magill, if you’re listening.

Emily Ladau:
Truly an incredible human. Great interview. Love the flag. And yeah, I feel like I should clarify, it’s not like I am not proud of who I am and it’s not like I’m actively hating myself or anything. That’s not what I’m saying. I’m just saying that Disability Pride Month, I’m not vibing with it right now.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah. When was the last time you did vibe with it? It’s not a trick question. Because I honestly can’t remember. We used to go to the parade in New York every year. That was fun. And we used to-

Emily Ladau:
Oh my God, that’s right.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah.

Emily Ladau:
I didn’t even think about that. And even though it was so hot and sweaty, you would ride on the back of my chair and we would have a good time.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah. And we would meet all kinds of disabled people and it would be cool.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah. I think we were just younger and in a better place and Obama was still president.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Obama was still president. No, I think that’s it. I think you’re right.

Emily Ladau:
That’s the truth. Then it all went downhill.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Thanks, Obama.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah. Honestly, I don’t think that I have felt real disability pride since the Obama administration. If you want my honest assessment right now.

Kyle Khachadurian:
We should get him on the show. Ask him what his feelings on the disability pride are.

Emily Ladau:
I mean, you joke, and I know we’re never going to get him but-

Kyle Khachadurian:
I mean, I joke, but…

Emily Ladau:
The Obamas produced Crip Camp, so-

Kyle Khachadurian:
They did, yeah.

Emily Ladau:
Just saying.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I don’t even know what it means to be… I don’t even know what it means to really have disability pride, which is weird. Because I’m a straight guy, and every June when it’s Pride Month, the real one, I get that. And it’s not just because all my friends are queer. That just makes sense to me. And it’s ironic because disability pride rolls around and I get that on an intellectual level, but I go into this existential like, “Well, am I really disabled?” Which happens every once in a while, but it happens mostly in July because sometimes when I surround myself with a bunch of disabled people, I find that my experience is very, very different than what I perceive to be the majority of disabled people. Which is not true. I know that. And I know that people like me belong here too. But I just wish that I had the confidence of people with invisible acquired disabilities when they join our community. Truly. It sounds like I’m being sarcastic, but I’m not. I really don’t have that in the way that a lot of other people do. And I feel like if I did, I might feel a little bit more pride during July, but I just don’t. It’s a month.

Emily Ladau:
No, that’s totally fair. I think for me, every year I struggle with the concept of disability pride because I don’t want to be ashamed of who I am, and I don’t think that disabled people should be ashamed of who they are, but it’s also really, really hard to be proud of something when it’s also the thing that causes so much difficulty in your life, whether it’s chronic pain or lack of access or just general frustration at the universe being so ableist. And there’s this poem that I really like, I don’t know if I’ve ever shared it with you or if you know about it, it’s called You Get Proud By Practicing, by a disabled woman named Laura Hershey who passed away many years ago. But it’s just about how being proud of being disabled takes practice in a really ableist world. And it’s a beautiful poem and I love it, and I think about it all the time. But at the end of the day, sometimes I just don’t feel like practicing. I’m exhausted. It’s tough out here.

Kyle Khachadurian:
The fact that it’s something that needs to be practiced too, you know?

Emily Ladau:
Yes.

Kyle Khachadurian:
And I haven’t read the poem and I’m sure it’s gorgeous, but it’s true. And I don’t know queer homies help us out, did you have to learn to be proud of your identities? Because I mean, we don’t know. But I would genuinely love to know because from the outside it looks pretty easy, but that could just be because we don’t know. To be proud, I mean. I’m not saying to be queer. I know that’s hard, but to be proud of it, teach us your ways.

Emily Ladau:
To be proud of being queer.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah, yeah.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah. The Pride Month vibes are good.

Kyle Khachadurian:
The Pride Month vibes are always good. I love Pride Month. It is always a good time.

Emily Ladau:
I think at the beginning of Disability Pride Month, and I also just feel like I want to clarify, so I’ve had a couple people actually ask me if Disability Bride Month is just being gay and disabled and being proud of it and so I feel like I don’t want-

Kyle Khachadurian:
No, you guys get two months actually.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah. I’m like, “No, let’s not complete the two. Not taking away from Pride Month.”

Kyle Khachadurian:
If it’s a genuine question, that’s kind of cute though.

Emily Ladau:
Of course. It’s a valid question.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I could understand not knowing that, yeah.

Emily Ladau:
But at the beginning of Disability Pride Month, coming off the tails of Pride Month, I feel like the fire dims. Not dims, lessens, stops burning, the spark out. I suddenly forgot how fire works. But yeah, and it’s not to say that one is more important than the other, but there are so many disabled queer people. You need to tell me you can only celebrate one facet of a person’s identity and then that’s it?

Kyle Khachadurian:
I mean, I don’t know. All the disabled queer people I know are pretty equally proud of both. But I would bet that there are a bunch, hundreds, thousands, hundreds of thousands that are weighted in one direction.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah, it’s a zillion. Yeah, so it just kind of makes me sad because I wish that I would see the same passion that I see for other celebrations of pride and heritage when it comes to Disability Pride Month. But I think that people just don’t see disability as something to be proud of as an identity that you embrace. So I feel like half the battle is just trying to get people to understand why you can be proud of yourself as a disabled person when they’re like, “What would you be proud of for? This is a bad thing.”

Kyle Khachadurian:
Oh, they used to be me. They used to totally be me. I struggle with, not with that specific kind of questioning anymore, but every once in a while I’ll be scrolling on the internet or something and I’ll see somebody on the CP subreddit or something and they’ll just be like… The way that people talk about having CP, they’ll talk about it like it’s just a thing that they have and not a piece of what makes them who they are. And on a level I get that, I really do. Because practically how it affects you is like that. But it is also part of who you are. And that’s a mental shift that I don’t… Because of who we are, I think we think a lot of disabled people have done that, but I fear that maybe not. I feel like actually we’re a very loud, important minority within people who are disabled in this country or the world.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah, you’re making me think of I’ve seen this described before as when you use person-first language and you say person with a disability, it’s like, “Am I a person and I’m carrying a suitcase that has my disability in it? No, I’m a disabled person. I don’t just carry it around.”

Kyle Khachadurian:
I got to admit, that’s how CP feels sometimes though.

Emily Ladau:
You’re carrying it around?

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yes. Which is ironic actually, because person-first language is the only way you can describe someone with CP. You can’t do identity. I’m not a CP person. That doesn’t make sense. So I guess maybe, even though I prefer identity-first language.

Emily Ladau:
But people, it’s so complicated because then people are like, “Oh, Down syndrome person.” And I’m like, no, no.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah, I don’t know. It’s whatever feels best and whatever the person with that disability says they like more.

Emily Ladau:
It’s like a diagnosis thing. You wouldn’t call me a Larson syndrome person.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Actually, that almost sounds vaguely insulting.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Like, “You, you…”

Emily Ladau:
Yeah, I don’t like it. But at the beginning of the month, I posted something for Disability Pride Month on social media, and I was all fired up and pissed off because I was mad that… And it seems so small in the grand scheme of things, and I just want to clarify that I understand that, but my fiance found us a gluten-free bakery, and I really wanted to go try it, and there was a step up to it, and I was just like, “You know what? I’m so tired of this. I have so many other things I would like to devote my energy to.”

Kyle Khachadurian:
You should not have to look up whether or not a spot is accessible. I mean, I know you do. I know we all do. But the reason you forgot isn’t because you were being careless. It was because that’s just something you should not ever have to deal with in your life.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah. I’m like for once in my life, just being a little spontaneous, want to go to a bakery, can’t go to the bakery, and then I’m expending my energy getting pissed about that.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I mean, not to go off topic, but have we ever talked about how being disabled just it doesn’t allow for spontaneity in any way at all?

Emily Ladau:
I mean, we’ve done 8 million episodes, so I imagine it’s come up, but it is a good episode topic, so put it in the brain bank.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah, I’ll put it in my mind palace.

Emily Ladau:
But for real, no, that’s a good one. Because yeah, spontaneity is just not a thing when you’re disabled. And I was so fired up at the beginning of the month. I was like, “I have a fiery disability pride.” And anyway, then I started seeing, I don’t know if you’ve seen this, some people are not calling it Disability Pride Month, they’re calling it Disability Wrath Month.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I’ve not seen that, but that’s cool. I feel like Pride has better optics, but I feel like I like the word wrath better there.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah, it’s just like we’re no longer settling for the garbage nonsense that is candy coated pride, and we are really mad and we want you to know it. I was like, “Yeah, (beep) yeah.” You can bleep me if you need to.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I’m so tired of being tired.

Emily Ladau:
Mm-hmm. Yes.

Kyle Khachadurian:
And Pride Month demands more from us by virtue of who we are, whether we want to or not, because you feel bad if you don’t participate, at least a little. You feel almost guilty. It’s like, “(beep) why am I not?” And it’s I’m (beep) tired all the time.

Emily Ladau:
And I tried to participate, I’m just going to say, my friend and I went to… They have in lieu of the parade that used to happen in July, now there’s this festival in Central Park. And props to them, they do a great job of putting it together. They have musical performances, they have all kinds of exhibit booths. But there is a heat wave like nobody’s business. And we went to this festival and maybe lasted a half an hour before I was like, “That’s it, I’m done.” And my friend was like, “I think we need to start a petition to change Disability Pride Month to April because disabled people don’t do so well in the heat.”

Kyle Khachadurian:
Well, is it only in July because it’s the ADA?

Emily Ladau:
I think so, yeah.

Kyle Khachadurian:
All right. So I mean, honestly, you could change it to any month, it’d be fine.

Emily Ladau:
The section 504 regulations after the 504 sit-in, that was in April. April’s a good month.

Kyle Khachadurian:
There you go. April. Here, here. I will sign that petition. You’ve convinced me.

Emily Ladau:
Right? Sign me up. I’m truly just so over the month of July and my birthday’s in July. Your birthday’s in July. We should love this month.

Kyle Khachadurian:
We should love this month.

Emily Ladau:
I don’t love it.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I don’t love it.

Emily Ladau:
I really don’t.

Kyle Khachadurian:
It’s so hot and wet here.

Emily Ladau:
It’s a terrible month. Truly awful. And I just wasn’t feeling festive at this festival. It was a festival. You were supposed to be festive. It’s in the name. I wasn’t feeling it. I was like, “I’m hot.” And then you know what? If you want to go real deep on that?

Kyle Khachadurian:
Go ahead.

Emily Ladau:
Climate change.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Hell yeah.

Emily Ladau:
I’m hot because of climate change.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Hell yeah.

Emily Ladau:
Climate change harms disabled people.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Hell yeah.

Emily Ladau:
It harms everybody, but it especially harms disabled people. So if you really want to go into that rabbit hole, I have no reason to be happy right now. Yeah, I’m getting so dark.

Kyle Khachadurian:
No, but yeah. And God, I’m sorry that we’re feeding into the miserable disabled person trope, but it’s because…

Emily Ladau:
I didn’t even think of that. Oh my God.

Kyle Khachadurian:
If you haven’t been paying attention for the last 17 minutes, you can see how hard it is.

Emily Ladau:
That’s so funny. I wasn’t even thinking about that. But there is 100% somebody who’s listening and they’re like, “Oh my God you two are-”

Kyle Khachadurian:
“God, won’t they shut up?”

Emily Ladau:
Yeah, you’re being the cliche bitter cripple right now. Please stop.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yes, I am.

Emily Ladau:
Also, like, I’m not apologizing for that.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah.

Emily Ladau:
Sorry if it seems whiny.

Kyle Khachadurian:
It’s very whiny. That’s what we do here.

Emily Ladau:
But I also really feel like there are going to be some people listening, I hope, who are going to feel less alone because you don’t have to buy into the, “Rah rah, yay disability pride,” all the time. Sometimes you can just be like, “Wow, actually this sucks.”

Kyle Khachadurian:
You ever seen that meme that’s inside you or two wolves and it’s like two wolves? It’s stupid. Nevermind.

Emily Ladau:
No, wait. I’m sure I have, but…

Kyle Khachadurian:
The one that I’m thinking of is inside you it’s two wolves. One of them, and they do like… This is going to sound so stupid. I’m sorry to the person who has to transcribe this. One of them wants to sleep like this, and it says, “Honk shoo, honk shoo,” and the other one wants to sleep like this, and it says, “Himimimi,” like a cartoon. Anyway-

Emily Ladau:
Is it supposed to be like the snoring sounds?

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yes, exactly. Yes. Yes. You got it. Perfect. Good job.

Emily Ladau:
Okay, great.

Kyle Khachadurian:
The reason I’m bringing it up though is I feel conflicted because on the one hand, what better way to celebrate being proud of exactly who you are and the way that you are than being a member of society in a way that suits you in a society that doesn’t like you? But that comes at the cost of not being able to… Because if you’re a quote, unquote, “regular person” you’re probably not going to celebrate yourself and be proud of yourself. And you know what? You should, because this world doesn’t like us. And I feel conflicted. I do. I don’t know. It’s rough.

Emily Ladau:
I mean, I only waited like 20 minutes to get to this point, but the reality is that if the election goes the way that I’m kind of thinking it will then people really don’t have to like us because they will have government sanctioned reasons to not like us.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Great.

Emily Ladau:
So I mean, I’ve been reading analyses of how a Trump administration would just decimate supports for disabled people, for all minorities really. But yeah, so I’m just… Yeah.

Kyle Khachadurian:
We already have nothing. We don’t have nothing. We will have nothing. But what we have is crumbs. To take (beep) like that away is crazy.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah, I mean, we’re literally fighting against what already exists. I know that we have been sponsored by ABLEnow before, but friendly reminder that ABLE accounts exist because apparently there’s a line of thinking that disabled people are otherwise not allowed to have assets and still receive the support that they need.

Kyle Khachadurian:
How dare we?

Emily Ladau:
So yeah, we’re already fighting all the battles and I just worry about what’s about to go if things change. But you know what? We still have a few months before I have to go down that rabbit hole. We just happen to be recording this on the week of both the assassination attempt and Biden dropping out. So it’s a little bit on my brain. Anyway, back to disability wrath, the other thing that I was thinking is what about just Disability Neutrality Month? I’m neutral about my disability. It’s here. It exists.

Kyle Khachadurian:
What you just said reminded me that Disability Pride Month really should be in April because that’s the month that Autism Acceptance Month usually is. And we all know how that goes. And it just reminded me of the Tone It Down Taupe campaign that someone that we… I don’t know who did it, but it’s someone that we know. I’m not going to attribute it wrong. I genuinely don’t know who it is.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah, I don’t remember.

Kyle Khachadurian:
But what you just said made me think of that. Yeah.

Emily Ladau:
Should we explain that?

Kyle Khachadurian:
You can do it better. You should.

Emily Ladau:
The whole thing with Autism Speaks and Light It Up Blue for autism has just become such a heavily used concept for autism. Well, first of all, there’s Autism Awareness Month, which is what the Autism Speaks brand of people call it, and then there’s Autism Acceptance Month, and so-

Kyle Khachadurian:
That’s what we call it.

Emily Ladau:
Yes. And you don’t need to be aware of autistic people. Like, “Okay, great. You’re aware. Cool.” Same thing with CP Awareness Month. I don’t get that either.

Kyle Khachadurian:
If your month has awareness in it… Well, okay, I’m a little more sympathetic to Awareness Month for CP only because it started as a way to get federal funding and it receives none. So the federal government needs to be aware. But in terms of practical applications of awareness of disability, yes, I don’t like any awareness months because the people who have it are aware they have it no matter what it is.

Emily Ladau:
Right. And I don’t want you to be aware of someone with a disability.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah, I want you to do something about it.

Emily Ladau:
It’s like, “What does that mean?” Yeah. But anyway, so the whole Light It Up Blue thing, I think it’s even gotten to the point where the Empire State Building gets lit up blue during April.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Is it really? God, that sucks.

Emily Ladau:
I think so. And if you want to go down a Google rabbit hole, look up the fact that Autism Speaks is largely considered to be a hate group by many autistic individuals.

Kyle Khachadurian:
You know, they’re marketing people though. They got to have… I mean, if you and I had one 10th of what they’ve got, we could change the world.

Emily Ladau:
Oh, I mean, totally. Yeah, they have absolutely cornered the market on turning unnecessary crap blue. It’s like the pink for breast cancer. Absolutely meaningless.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah, it is something else.

Emily Ladau:
But yeah, Tone It Down Taupe is the response to Light It Up Blue. Anyway, neither of us identify as autistic, so I highly recommend going down the rabbit hole of autistic writers who do this way more justice than we do.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah.

Emily Ladau:
But I am just not feeling Disability Pride Month. That’s what I wanted to record an episode about. At the end of the day, I just wanted people to know that we’re still here, we still love this podcast, we are still very disabled. I’m just not feeling super proud of it right now.

Kyle Khachadurian:
This is going to sound counterintuitive. I don’t mean this in the way that… I’m going to call them bad actors, when they say this, they tend to mean it. But I sometimes feel like I shouldn’t need a month to be proud of my… I’m saying that as someone with a disability, man. No one come at me with, “Then why do we have Pride Month in June?” Because they want it. That’s why. I’m talking about me in July.

Emily Ladau:
Oh my God. Okay. I know exactly what you mean by bad actors. Also, you just reminded me. So NPR had re-upped an interview that I did a while ago.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Oh, is that old?

Emily Ladau:
So everyone thinks it’s new. It’s from 2021.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Wow. You fooled me. I should have clicked it. I just…

Emily Ladau:
But no, the reason that I bring this up is because I was on the comment section.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Oh God.

Emily Ladau:
And I mean, people just… I don’t know. They say don’t read the comments. Did I read the comments? Of course I did. But there’s someone who said… Wait, hold on. “No, Democrats. Just no. July is America Pride Month. It’s also White History Month. Every victimhood group doesn’t get their own month.”

Kyle Khachadurian:
Wow. What the hell is White History Month? What the… Is that-

Emily Ladau:
What is White History Month? All of human history?

Kyle Khachadurian:
No, that’s literally… That’s not real, is it? That’s not actually, it can’t possibly be a thing. That’s just history.

Emily Ladau:
But this was my favorite part. “Every victimhood group doesn’t get their own month.” Okay, Brian, so then you’re a victim.

Kyle Khachadurian:
But yeah, pick one. There’s 12 of them. Also, I am very aware that white history is not just history. Just FYI.

Emily Ladau:
Obviously. Yes, of course.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I know you know that I know that. I’m telling everybody else.

Emily Ladau:
Just clarifying for everybody.

Kyle Khachadurian:
No, but I just feel like that’s actually nuts. People who want to be victims so badly that they feel left out when other people are just… We’re just like, “Hey, we’re here,” for 30 days. See, this is making me reverse the thing I just said. See, now that you’ve said that, I’m like, “Oh, yeah, wait. That’s why we do that. That’s exactly why.” It’s because of Brian in the comments of that NPR article.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah. See, literally one minute, I’m like, “I don’t care,” and the next minute I’m like, “Oh, Brian.”

Kyle Khachadurian:
But it’s just like, I just don’t understand people who just… Most things don’t affect me. I’m a very privileged person. And when I see something that I am like, “Oh, that’s not me,” I just keep going about my life. It doesn’t offend me. It doesn’t upset me. In fact, I think it’s cool usually.

Emily Ladau:
Really, really wanted to comment back to him and be like, “Hmm, who’s the victim now, Brian, if you’re upset that your month is not getting recognized [inaudible 00:27:09]?”

Kyle Khachadurian:
Let’s take October, Brian History Month. Let’s all talk about Brian. There you go, buddy. You got one.

Emily Ladau:
Also, of course his name is Brian. Sorry.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I knows, the most generic white guy named.

Emily Ladau:
I’m sorry.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Said by a guy named Kyle, right?

Emily Ladau:
Wasn’t there about to be some event in Kyle, Texas where every Kyle was supposed to go?

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yes. We didn’t beat the record. There was another… I think there’s a town of Ryan and they have the record.

Emily Ladau:
Okay. Well, oh well.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I’m very upset by that.

Emily Ladau:
Sorry about that.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I’ve never felt particularly close to my name, but the amount of DMs that I got and texts and phone calls, it was literally like, “Oh.” It was as if everyone who I know remembered I exist. Because I’m talking about people who I was not close to being like, “Dude, you should do this.”

Emily Ladau:
Well, of course, because everybody’s like, “Oh yeah, I met a Kyle once.”

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah, and it’s me. It’s just like… I’m going to go next year though. It looked like a great time honestly.

Emily Ladau:
I’ve never really thought about if you match your name, I don’t know if you do.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I don’t. I don’t. I don’t hit walls, women or drink Monster. I really don’t. I don’t like dirt biking. Any stereotype that you could think of for my name, I do not fit it. I like rock music.

Emily Ladau:
That is a really good tagline. “I’m Kyle. I don’t hit walls or women and I don’t…” What is it, like crush Monster [inaudible 00:28:44]?

Kyle Khachadurian:
Hashtag not all Kyles. Jesus Christ. No, that’s-

Emily Ladau:
I’m sorry, [inaudible 00:28:52] the tagline it would be a good one.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Hey, that’s not… You’re right. You’re right. I also… Oh, what’s another Kyle stereotype? This is fun. I can’t even ride a bike. Thank God for that. Oh my God, would I be a stereotypical Kyle if I didn’t have CP? Ew, no, I don’t want to do that. It’s not good.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah. See, this is why you should be proud of your disability. It saves you from being a stereotypical Kyle.

Kyle Khachadurian:
This is why my brain damage is not that bad. That’s great. No, that’s true.

Emily Ladau:
It’s like congrats on the brain damage, dude.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Hell yeah. You’re right.

Emily Ladau:
It is serving you so well.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Oh, you’re so right.

Emily Ladau:
Disability pride. Final takeaways?

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah. Have it if you want it. It’s okay not to have it too. Emily, which Brooklyn Nine-Nine character am I?

Emily Ladau:
Oh. Oh my God. Oh my God. Okay. Well, you are Ron Swanson from Parks and Rec. I’m just trying to think who is-

Kyle Khachadurian:
But I’m also kind of Ben from Parks and Rec, and I’m also kind of Andy from Parks and Rec too.

Emily Ladau:
I know. Okay. Okay. Okay. I think you’re a little bit of Jake.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Oh, that makes me happy.

Emily Ladau:
And I think you’re a little bit of Captain Holt.

Kyle Khachadurian:
That makes me so happy.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah. And then kind of also Gina.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Oh gosh. Really? That’s funny.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah.

Kyle Khachadurian:
That’s pretty funny. I would’ve said Jake and hold, but you’re so right.

Emily Ladau:
The reason that I would say Gina is because she just gives no Fs.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah, you’re right.

Emily Ladau:
And Captain Hold is just like, “I am unbothered. You are full of nonsense.” And then Jake’s like, “What up? What up? I’m weird.”

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yes.

Emily Ladau:
And you’re like a good mix of all of it.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Thank you. Oh, that means so much to me.

Emily Ladau:
Who would I be? Say Amy.

Kyle Khachadurian:
No, you are. You have a little Amy in you. I wouldn’t say she’s-

Emily Ladau:
[inaudible 00:31:01].

Kyle Khachadurian:
You’re a little Rosa Diaz.

Emily Ladau:
Oh, hell yeah.

Kyle Khachadurian:
A little.

Emily Ladau:
I’ll take it.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Minus the bisexual fury. But she’s in there.

Emily Ladau:
I have fury and I have also found women attractive before.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Oh there. Well, no, all right, nevermind.

Emily Ladau:
I am [inaudible 00:31:22] curious bisexual.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Nevermind. You got to start wearing layers. See, that’s how you make a joke about a minority that you’re not a part of in a funny way, because that means that you know about them. Huh?

Emily Ladau:
Oh, I was just going to say, should I start wearing a leather jacket or something now?

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yes. See? Okay. We love our bi homies. Oh, God. Wait, but you’re not just Rosa though. I’m trying to think of a third for you because you’re more than…

Emily Ladau:
Just as long as you don’t say I’m Scully or something.

Kyle Khachadurian:
You know what’s funny? I’ve watched that show through twice. I don’t know which one’s Hitchcock and which one’s Scully. I have no clue. Do you?

Emily Ladau:
Yeah. Scully is the sweater vest opera guy.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Oh, okay.

Emily Ladau:
And Hitchcock is the other one.

Kyle Khachadurian:
See, okay. I so badly just want to be like, “You’re Donna Meagle actually,” but that’s not her show.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah. She’s not on that show. But it’s okay. I like to believe they all exist in the same universe.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I know.

Emily Ladau:
There was a crossover episode between Brooklyn Nine-Nine and New Girl once, and it was great.

Kyle Khachadurian:
There was, and it was. Okay who’s your-

Emily Ladau:
Did we get to a final takeaway?

Kyle Khachadurian:
No, no. This is more fun. Hold on. Wait.

Emily Ladau:
Okay. Okay. Okay.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Who’s your… Did you watch New Girl?

Emily Ladau:
I’m in the middle of watching it for the umpteenth time right now, yes. I’ve seen it so many times.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Okay. Who am I more like? Which of the three guys?

Emily Ladau:
Oh, oh-

Kyle Khachadurian:
Because to me, there’s an answer to this, and I just want to see if you agree.

Emily Ladau:
I actually think you’re Nick.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Interesting.

Emily Ladau:
But. But, I think it’s just because of the way that you find certain things in the world absurd.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Fair enough. I would say that I’m Schmidt, to be honest with you.

Emily Ladau:
You are Schmidt. You are Schmidt. But here’s why I think you have some Nick in you.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Okay.

Emily Ladau:
Because Nick is just like a grumpy old man who’s like, “I’m not paying for the wifi,” and I feel like you’re a grumpy old man.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I am a grumpy old man.

Emily Ladau:
But with Schmidt, I feel like you have more Schmidt vibes, but you’re not a jerk like him.

Kyle Khachadurian:
He is a jerk. I am not a jerk like him. But other than that, I think I’m pretty Schmidty.

Emily Ladau:
You are pretty Schmidty. But Schmidty is currently pissing me off because we’re in the middle of his particularly bad period where he two timed Elizabeth and Cece. Sorry for spoilers.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Oh, yeah. It’s okay actually.

Emily Ladau:
For an old show.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah.

Emily Ladau:
Not you.

Kyle Khachadurian:
You’re right. I don’t know why I said that. I don’t know why I said that. I just told you. We’re having a conversation about it. Why would I-

Emily Ladau:
Well, right now, I’m just feeling Nick because he’s a lovable, silly goose.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Idiot? Yeah.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah. I was trying not to use that word, but…

Kyle Khachadurian:
That’s all right. It’s me. You’re not telling them they’re… What are some other good shows?

Emily Ladau:
Nobody can see me dancing, but I am.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I can see you dancing.

Emily Ladau:
We’ve lost the thread, you guys.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Sorry, I’m just in Brooklyn. I’m in Brooklyn Nine-Nine.

Emily Ladau:
How about you tell us what TV character you think we are? If you listened this far.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Good idea.

Emily Ladau:
I want to know

Kyle Khachadurian:
You are Leslie Knope.

Emily Ladau:
I really do believe I am. Yes. I think that you’re-

Kyle Khachadurian:
You are. Leslie Knope. If I ever meet someone more Leslie Knope than you, I will not ever talk to them. It can’t be true.

Emily Ladau:
My final takeaway is feel however you want.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Just because we’re two curmudgeons talking about how we don’t feel pride doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have to. And you shouldn’t need our permission to feel pride either.

Emily Ladau:
But you have it.

Kyle Khachadurian:
You do have it. No matter what month it is.

Emily Ladau:
Yeah, in August, you should still feel really good about yourself. As a matter of fact, you should feel better about yourself in August.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah.

Emily Ladau:
Because we don’t need one month. I don’t know. Whatever. I hate August. If there’s any month that I hate more than July, it is August.

Kyle Khachadurian:
You know something? I used to love the summer and the older I get the less… Summer sucks.

Emily Ladau:
You are truly a curmudgeon.

Kyle Khachadurian:
It’s because I’m not in school anymore. That’s why. Summer was only cool because you weren’t in school. That’s the only reason.

Emily Ladau:
Agreed. Totally agree. Anyway, this has been another episode of The Accessible Stall.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Support us on Patreon, please.

Emily Ladau:
Just $1 a month.

Kyle Khachadurian:
At patreon.com/theaccessiblestall. Yeah, what she was saying. It makes all of our shows accessible. We can transcribe them for people like you and people like me and people like Emily.

Emily Ladau:
Do you remember when you would watch PBS and it would be like, “This show was made possible by viewers like you,” and I was like, “Me?”

Kyle Khachadurian:
Little five-year-old me felt so important. I was like, “I’m helping.” I’m not helping. I’m costing them money by watching Arthur. Oh, no. Someone help us get Obama on the show.

Emily Ladau:
Please. Listen to the quality of this podcast we just created. Obama belongs here.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Oh, I wish I could do my Obama on demand. I do a pretty good Obama, but I have to warm up, and then I get only one good line, and then it goes away.

Emily Ladau:
He does a great Obama impression. It’s really good, actually.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah. I can’t do it though. It’s like when someone asks me to whistle. Sorry, I’m yapping.

Emily Ladau:
Might we say, you look good today.

Kyle Khachadurian:
You look great today in your pants.

Emily Ladau:
Except for you, Brian. I am really annoyed with you.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Yeah, Brian, screw you, man, with your silly comment on the Emily thing specifically. If you’re a cool Brian, we’re not talking about you. Or are we?

Emily Ladau:
Oh, no.

Kyle Khachadurian:
No, we’re not.

Emily Ladau:
We love all Brians who are not horrible racists.

Kyle Khachadurian:
I like everyone who’s not a horrible racist.

Emily Ladau:
Same.

Kyle Khachadurian:
Not a fan of horrible racists.

Emily Ladau:
Agreed.

Kyle Khachadurian:
You can quote me on that. I don’t say it very often on the show.

Emily Ladau:
Thanks very much for listening.

Kyle Khachadurian:
See you next time.

Emily Ladau:
Bye.